I'm Alive!!

Honest folks, I'm still around. I had a lumbar puncture on Monday. The guy who did it has a record of 'no headaches.' Well, I broke his record apparently... I got a headache.

What is a lumbar puncture? Glad you asked. Insert needle into L-3. There is a fluid filled sac that lines the lumbar vertebrae. They take fluid out via the inserted needle, test it for disease ie. MS. I should have results next week, so I've been told.

Tues. I was great. Wednesday, not so much. Thursday I was ready to meet Jesus, my head hurt so bad. I haven't been on the computer in two days. I get a headache sitting here, in fact, I am getting one right now, but am trying to hustle before it gets bad.

I can get a blood patch and that will help. What is a blood patch? Glad you asked. They insert needle into your back again, draw blood and very quickly before it clots, insert blood into the punctured location. They say it brings immediate relief. I could do it, but I am going to try and lay flat all weekend and see if that works. OHH and the prescription for the headaches? "Drink lots of water and caffeine!!" Nice huh?

As soon as I'm able I promise to update this thing.

Where my mind has been all day.

Revenge of the Terds

The day we were leaving for Grandpa's funeral, I was in charge of getting everything ready ie. kids, me, bags, car etc.

I was doing good, ahead of schedule. I put the kids in their respected rooms, Coop in his crib and Chloe in her room WITH baby gate as so she does not escape.

I'm calling the hotel to confirm our reservation. I take a shower. I begin the long tedious process of doing my hair.

Now Coop has been whinning for a good 30 minutes. He usually whines when he is in bed and isn't tired. He doesn't scream just an annoying whine that I can ignore very very well because it is the same whine I ignore while still in bed in the morning.

I open his door and notice rocks on the floor. My thoughts. "Hmm, that's weird. How did rocks get on the floor. Hmm." *open door beyond a crack* "HOLY COW! That is the smell of something not of the Lord!"

It is then I realize the rocks are not rocks at all, but rock shaped terds, tossed out by some little boy in his bed. I look at Coop and it is then I realize my sweet child, whom I delivered and carried for nine months. The one whose toes I love to nibble, whose smile melts me..

... that child was.. *taking a deep long breath... letting it out in a somber sigh*... a poop launcher.

That child of Matt's, he became Matt's son, had removed his diaper, pooped in his bed, smeered it like paint on his white canvas of a sheet, tossed out the 'ball terds' and then decided his 'canvas' wasn't enough... He used himself as canvas. Oh what a lovely sight and smell.

I noticed a yellow/brown color on the crib slates, on the bed, on his feet, top and bottom, on his arms, hands, fingers, toes, cheeks and yes in his mouth. *another long deep breath.... letting it out with a tear and a cringe, thinking about bleach*

I do what any normal mother would do, I grab the video camera. I'd show you but there is a crotch shot and this is a G rated blog, sometimes PG, but today it is G.

Then I grabbed the camera and then I begin doing what any normal mother does, I call the husband and father of this child. He does what any normal father does, says, "SICK!!"

Then I begin clean-up. I remove the rocks, start the bath all the while thinking, "I JUST GOT CLEANED!" I stand in the tub and 'bathe' Coop, using our soap which is just a nub of a bar. You know the little sliver of soap that remains because neither husband nor wife remembers to get a new bar before entering the shower and so the nub wears down until someone finally yells, "Honey! Can you get me some soap?"

I put the nub on Coop's head, because of course he is an equal opportunity poop smearer and he dare not leave out the hair. I go to rub the nub on his scalp and it sticks. The whole nub is in his hair. I rinse and rinse and rinse and rinse until the nub disappears. Then I slide him up and down the tub to wash his man parts. Then I drain. Then I decide not to fill the tub but to use running water so the poo is exiting the tub.

He is clean and goes in Chloe's gated community. Then I clean the room/crib. I would have left it if poop didn't smell or if Matt were almost home.

I grab bleach and carpet cleaner. I wipe the crib slates and step in something quite moist. I notice Matt's son had not only pooped but peed all over the room. *long deep breath and a sigh*

I toss everything in the wash, add bleach and turn it on boiling hot. When it is done, poop speckles remained, so I tossed it all.

What do you think the diaper looked like?

Grandpa Janzen

What an emotional roller coaster the past few days have been. On Wednesday evening, we received a phone call that we knew would soon come, but once it came we couldn't believe it was time. Matt's Grandpa passed away.
The night we got word, Matt said, "I don't know why I'm crying." I told him, "Because you are thinking about all of your memories." And through his tears he shook his head and said, "Yep."

I prayed that night, July 15, that the day of the funeral would be a gorgeous day.

God answered.

The six grandsons, two by marriage.

Grandpa was a veteran of WWII.

I edited some of the pictures. In my mind, photos should tell a story.

I thought the bugle laying there was very telling.
Folding the flag.


Then they handed it off to Grandma.

This is the Mennonite Cemetary in Medford. Grandma & Grandpa's family is buried here. Such a neat place, has a lot of history.

This is Grandpa's grandparents. They were immigrants fleeing the persecution of Christians. Grandpa's parents.
Grandma's Grandparents.

The day was filled with many tears, but joy in knowing as followers and believers in Christ, we will see him soon.

Then you look at Cooper and you can't help but smile.
Then you look at Chloe... and you smile again.
Especially when she hops in the driver seat of the car with Grandma in the back.

Today

I've kind of fell off the face of the blogging world huh?

I've been trying to post 'happy, fun, love, kids smiling' things, as to mask my heart and true emotions.

When people ask, "How are you?" I usually begin to tear up. Not because I'm bad, but because I don't know how I am; physically. Physically I feel like I am falling apart. Emotionally, I am tired. Spiritually, I am trying to be a sponge and soak it all in and at times that is overwhelming.

I explain it as, "I feel like I'm in a holding pattern." Meaning, I'm not sure where to go or where I am going. I'm just waiting.

I just need some good news. I feel like I haven't really had a good laugh in a while.

I can't go out and do a bunch of stuff with the kids b/c if I get an episode I don't know what I'll do. I can't lay in the car for an hour until it passes. If I walk too much, that usually will trigger one.

I'm just tired. I used to worry about what I have, now I tend to worry about doing too much and getting an episode. I feel bad that I can't take the kids to the water park. I can't go outside with them. I just am tired. I want to do some sort of exercise, but I'm kind of scared something will set it all off.

Sorry to be all 'Debbie Downer,' but it's just where I am.

I'm reading "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan and so far it is wonderful. It has been very uplifting.(Not that this post is reflecting that. But you should have seen me a few weeks ago.) I may share what I'm learning, I don't know.

For now, I'm just waiting. I go to the neuro on July 22. I am excited for that.

Have You Seen A Good Movie Lately?

Have you seen a good movie lately?

We haven't. We aren't movie goers though; we're too cheap. We rent through Redbox.

If you are like us and haven't seen a good movie or if the last movie you rented was picked by your wife and it was NO GOOD then....

...join us at a lifechurch.tv campus for AT THE MOVIES, starting July 11th!! Come see how God uses Craig & movies to speak to your heart.

It's a good time and always a good message, SOOOOO find the nearest campus and go! Below is the list of campuses, click the city name to see their times and location.


Arizona
Phoenix
Florida
Wellington
New York
Albany
Oklahoma
Edmond
NW Oklahoma City
Oklahoma City
South Oklahoma City
Owasso
South Tulsa
Stillwater
Tulsa
Tennessee
Hendersonville
Texas
Fort Worth


FINE PRINT: You will not be able to see the messages online, you can only view these at your local theatre/campus.
FINE PRINT UPDATE: Apparently you can see the messages online for the ATM series. MY MISTAKE. I thought in the past this wasn't available. Geez. Loosin' my mind.

Coop & Dad

A Hair Cut

We finally took Chloe to get her hair cut. I wanted Matt to be there and every Saturday I would think to take her, but would forget. Matt didn't have to work on Friday, so off we went.

This is the place, Kid Dooz. So cute, perfect for kids.
The front area is a safari theme. Chloe informed us of every creature she would find hiding in the trees throughout the room.

This is the little area kids where can create a shampoo to their smelling. Chloe got the squirt bottle treament, which was free. And she was ok with that.

Chloe in her chair/ car. She got to watch Dora while the lady cut it.

Now this is the girly room. Once Chloe was finished we went in here to take pictures. When she walked in she gasped and said, "Is this MY room?!" And proceeded to touch every single thing.
Before.

Just after.

After in the girly room. She wouldn't/couldn't focus. She was in awe of her surroundings.

Her certificate certifying her first hair cut.

The Ride Home

We went to my Dad's house for the fourth. He and his wife just bought a house. They used to live in a teeny tiny apartment on Riverside in Tulsa. They have been in it for just a few weeks. Their old apartment over-looked the river, it was the BEST spot in town to see the fireworks! You were at eye level with them. Amazing. BUT no more of that. Which is fine. I'll give up fireworks for space and a yard for the kids!

Funny Chloe story, she's full of them these days. We were at my Dad's, Chloe is looking out the patio door and she says to me, "Mom I see a fireman!" I said, "A what honey?" Trying to ensure I heard her correctly. "A fireman!!" She screams at me, very excited. Now my Dad's backyard is not big at all, it's city size. I walk over, look and see nothing. My Dad's wife, shuts the blinds just in case. I let the comment go thinking, "Oh she's just using her imagination."

A while later I go outside and can hear the familiar sound of large fireworks detinating. Then the bell in my head went off. She means fireWORKS not fireMAN! So I go inside and say, "Chloe do you mean fireworks?"

"Ya, mom, fireworks man." Too funny.

Anyways, we didn't purposefully see fireworks this year, but I was determined to use the BULB mode on my phone.

Driving down the road going 65mph. This is what BULB mode makes cars look like. If you've ever wondered how they make cars looks funny on TV, it's a mode like this. Super slow shutter. The light is absorbed in motion. I'm not a techy but that's how I explain it to myself.

This was taking from a moving vehicle through the window.

The streams of car lights would look better if the car wasn't moving and I could use a tripod.

Different aperture setting. I think the above was at like 14. Made the lights yellower.

Anyways, hope everyone is doing well.

He's ALIVE

So Cooper is 15 months old today. I realized that just now. I was trying to think of a title for this post and thought of the one above b/c he is starting to walk more often. Then I realized today is his 15 month birthday!!

Everyone agrees they grow up way too fast. But I think they grow faster when you have two kids to mess with.

Coop is a haus. He weighs about 25 lb's and is just a head heights shorter than Chloe. I drove by a baseball field here in town and there were a handful of little boys playing ball. I had a moment of forward thinking, I saw Cooper out there playing and wearing his baseball hat that made the tops of his ears stick out. I pictured me picking him up from baseball camp and him saying, "Mom, I got a really good hit and Coach said I did good!" Then I picture him attacking his Dad as soon as he walks in the door with the same story. And Chloe saying, "See my dress daddy? Don't I look like a princess?" And Matt saying, "Good job Coop and yes honey you do."

More Chloe Thoughts

Did you know...

... the water that comes out of the water toys at the splash pad tastes better than the puddles it created? I learned that, now pray I don't get sick with a hard to pronounce word.